close! but no cigar…

We had a doctor’s appointment today and were totally hoping that since we were 17 weeks wed get to see what this little one is.  Our doctor has a pretty strict personal policy that she does not reveal gender until 20 or 21 weeks…bummer!

While disappointed that we have to wait another FOUR WEEKS till we get to know, I actually really appreciate my Dr.’s desire to leave as little room for error as possible.

One thing that was super amazing was how much this little one has grown.  My belly bump hasn’t really popped out quite yet so it is so crazy to me how something like that can live in there.  Arms, legs, belly, fingers, toes, elbows, and knees…and of course a sweet little dome : ).  It’s just so crazy to me that there is a little person just like chillin in my stomach.  Swimming around and what not.

Something we did find out this week is how much weight I have gained.  oof!  My doctor assured me that I am doing just fine, moments after I looked at Brett with deep concern saying “I have NEVER weighed this much in my entire life!”  Before you get all…”you’re carrying a baby!” and “this is totally natural” and “this is just the beginning” on me, I’m gonna get  a little real.  My family is filled with a bunch of freaks who are super weight conscious.  My mom was a professional body builder for crying out loud, and has been a personal trainer for her entire life.  Currently she’s like a size 2 on a “big” day and is about 5’2”.  I myself have never been a size 2, and have hovered somewhat comfortably around average for some time.  Needless to say…at my thinnest I felt overweight.  I know I’m not the only girl in the world who has dealt with this, and I also know that I’m not the only girl in the world who has dealt with this during pregnancy.  I told my husband the other day that I feel like I’m being held down and forced to gain weight.  In reality I am…even if i worked out like crazy I’m still going to gain weight.  If I didn’t that would, I’m sure, be super unhealthy for this baby.  I teeter back and forth between totally freaking out to being encouraged that me growing steadily is good as baby grows steadily.

As I’ve started to feel better, I’m looking forward to getting back on track with eating healthier foods.  The first few months I was just eating whatever made me feel better, which I know was NOT the most nutritious of plans.  I do need to start at least going on walks through out the week, but the energy level is still workin itself out .

I really have no solution to this feeling.  Gaining weight is a part of growing a person.  Just when the mental yuckiness gets in there, it gets a little tricky.  I’d be super interested to hear how other moms have dealt with this side of things. Any tips, tricks, recipes, good prego work outs, or just some good ol fashioned advice on pushing through the whole body conscious mindset while pregnant?  Send em my way…lets help each other out!